I'm also feeling light because this past summer I reached a milestone...I have lost 100 pounds! This has mainly been through working my butt off at boot camp and watching what I ate. I'm still watching what I eat...as it travels from the McDonald's bag, or candy wrapper, or my plate, which is to say, I haven't been careful in controlling what I eat. I also haven't been faithful about going to boot camp. But this week I've gone three out of the four nights so far and that feels AWESOME.
Mainly, though, this feeling of lightness has come about as God draws me back to Him. I know that my weight is a direct correlation to my trust in Him. For a long time I didn't trust God, not because He wasn't trustworthy, but because I wasn't. I was immature and fickle and fearful of a God who loved me so much He sent His son to take the punishment for my sins. Was I worth that sacrifice? For the longest time, my head said no, even though God was telling me YES! in a million different ways. My heart was so torn...I couldn't see WHO I was (precious child of God) because of WHAT I thought I was (a failure in man's and God's eyes). But this past year and a half of literally peeling back the layers of lies that I believed has allowed God to write His love for me on my heart...so deeply etched is this love, that I cannot think about it without weeping...in gratitude and awe. And, I feel for the first time, like I have a purpose and a gifting. Knowing that I really am here on earth at this point in history for a purpose makes me realize that Jeremiah 29:11 is true (For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.) But, not only that verse...the next several verses are amazing as well...verses 12-14a say, "Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity." Isn't that amazing...He has a plan for every one of us...and it seems that once we realize that, we will call out to Him and He will hear us. And when we seek Him, He will be found by us...and the most precious to me right now...He will bring me back from captivity...even if it's a captivity of my own creation...my prison of extra weight! Can you see why I love Him so much?